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  • Day 1 of things afoot on the farm

    On Wednesday, June 27 th, 2012

    {Please pray? After our family Bible reading last night, little Shalom bowed her head and murmured from behind her falling veil of curls, and we heard it around the table, “Thank you, God, for giving Mom courage — that she doesn’t just say NO to everything. But at least she says Yes to somethings for You.” And I smiled and nodded — Yep. At least j...

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  • when you are feeling overwhelmed…

    On Friday, June 15 th, 2012

    When a sparrow gets caught behind the couch, it’s the light at the other end, behind the poor thing, that we keep trying to turn that one pounding heart towards. Because the thing is and don’t I know it: If you’re turned the wrong way, you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. So I’m kneeled on the floor in front of a pounding-heart bird a...

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  • Why You Really May Need to be Done with Safe: Being a Dangerous Disciple of the Unsafe God

    On Thursday, June 07 th, 2012

    My Gran, she’s taking slow walks outside the hospital now. Her heart’s growing stronger, beating certain. I wash down the cupboards in the kitchen. I pray for Gran’s heart attack recovery, for each step she keeps taking, ninety-one and frail-boned and Irish-determined. Life’s a risk and maybe she’s stronger than I am, accepting each heart beat, ea...

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  • Because this is the Truth about the real “Mother’s Day Card Mothers”

    On Wednesday, May 09 th, 2012

    I became a mother on the eve of Mother’s Day. And when they placed that vernix-covered, wrinkled babe into my 21-year old arms that muggy Saturday evening in May, no wave of relief, or ecstasy washed over me. Being the first to caress another human being’s cheek, I only felt raw, unadulterated, strangling terror. If I could have ran? I would have. The newborn baby bo...

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  • When You Feel like Everyone is Bigger, Better, Smarter… { or ‘How to be a Star’}

    On Thursday, May 03 rd, 2012

    When the fog meandered in lost on a spring evening in May, she hung her apron up in the back mudroom. She wandered down the back lane too. Down in the woods, she could hear them, the frogs singing, an invisible symphony. She knotted the one side of her skirt up to step over a pothole. She tried to make her way. In a world of reaching, how do you rest? In a culture of numbers h...

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  • when you are looking for His steadying hand

    On Thursday, March 29 th, 2012

    That is what came at the end. At the end of the day, after the pots soaked in the sink and the books and the remnants of the day stacked high in baskets. After she washed the eggs and threaded that needle for her mama doing up mending. After the raucous and rowdy finally stilled and the pansies drowsed heavy out under that Big  Dipper swinging high. That is...

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  • Best Advice for Hard Times

    On Friday, February 10 th, 2012

    It’s what I sang over dishes. Sang on the days when I felt too weary to take another step, clean up another mess, change another diaper. It’s what I sing when the enemy attacks with lies, when I feel alone and scared, when I fear the future and whispers in the shadows. It’s what my mother-in-law, a Dutch farmer’s wife and mother of nine, godly and with ...

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  • What a Parent Wants to Say Before a Child Leaves

    On Thursday, January 26 th, 2012

    Dear Son — who is called to climb a thousand walls, You have to know how your unfolding from me was a miracle. That’s the miraculous thing about miracles – they really do happen. How is it in this crazy, holy world does a girl-woman bear a boy-child? How does she raise a squalling boy-child into a man? I’ve never been one of those. And this the thing: there’s...

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  • The 1 Habit More Important than Quiet Time? {Memorize the Mount: Free Sermon on the Mount Memory Booklet}

    On Wednesday, January 25 th, 2012

    Who memorizes God in the age of Google? For a week, longer, I wake with these fears choking hard. Fears pushing me into the pit. And it comes while I struggle to get out of bed, comes early as the light pries back the dark, words we’ve been committing to heart — and I murmur them, hold onto them like a lifeline tossed: “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for thei...

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  • What’s the Answer to Anxiety?

    On Monday, January 16 th, 2012

    There are birds at the feeders, chickadees. They flit nervous. I watch the light in the trees, the way it falls across the walls. Across the calendar and to-do lists and I try to remember to breathe. John Calvin and I remember the year we were four. The year I was four, my sister was crushed under the wheels of a truck in our driveway. That’s my first memory, the day Aimee wa...

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  • The 1 Habit Your New Year Can’t Do Without: {Giveaway}

    On Thursday, January 05 th, 2012

    ‘Anail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit.” ~ Erasmus It’s only the 4th day of the New Year, when this woman cups my face in her hands and draws me right close to just say it. “It’s changed my life.” I’ve been trying to shake it for days, as I set the table, read with the kids, watch the snow come down — shake...

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  • 5 Steps to Making New Year’s Resolutions

    On Saturday, December 31 st, 2011

    The New Year wears hope like a fragrance. I watch a new day of the first month of a brand new year come, breaking up over the horizon, up through hopelessness, there on the rim of our fields and the scent, fresh, carries in on the wind… carries me. Unspoiled winter stretches across our fields — like an unfurled year awaiting new ways of walking. How to trek out acro...

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